A New Day Dawns in The Chuckles...

October 30th is FINALLY over and Port Chuck has turned the page to Halloween morning, or the morning of the Carly/Franco Revenge Wedding. 

 Nina:  So, MOMMY, how was stalking that brownstone place last night?   I hope you didn't, I don't know, FALL ASLEEP ON THE JOB!   What?   SILAS WAS THERE???   Nina, give yourself a head massage.  Nina, give yourself a head massage.  SILAS WAS THERE???  SO WHAT SO WHAT SO WHAT!!!!!    What's this, Mommy?  HE NEVER LEFT???    (spins around and slaps all that is living out of Madeline).  THEY'RE SCREWING!!!  I KNOW IT!!!  He's my HUSBAND and he CHEATED ON ME AGAIN!!!!   It's like...It's like...I'M INVISIBLE!!!  IN-VI-SI-BLE!!! I'll show them, Mommy.  I'll show them!   First, we'll steal the baby.  Then we'll kill Ava, THEN WE'LL KILL SILAS!   That'll show them how INVISIBLE I am!   Oh, FACEPALM!  Of course Silas is a doctor and he was checking on THE BABY!   I feel really stupid for about 5 seconds.  Lookee here, Mommy!   Lookee what Nina's got!   A little bitty vial of oxytocin with a needle!   This will send Ava into labor that no Needle of Non-Labor Goodness will be able to reverse.  Then, an adorable bundle of someone else's joy will fall peacefully into my arms!   

 Madeline:  Ugh, where's the ibuprofen?  I've been stalking that godawful brownstone all night and had to leave when the overgrown pizza boy went inside.   Who else was inside?  Well there was Kiki--still hate that name--and, brace yourself, Silas.   Yes, Silas was there with Ava.   He never left the building.   Do I have to spell it out for you, Nina?   HE WAS THERE ALL NIGHT.   Nina, GET A HOLD OF YOURSELF AND NEVER SLAP YOUR MOTHER LIKE THAT AGAIN!  Whoa, Nina.  Turn the cray dial down a few notches.   Silas is a doctor and Ava is pregnant.  Did it ever occur to you that he was making a house call?   What is that, Nina?   Whew, I was thinking for a minute you wanted me to perform a C-section with a kitchen knife.   A Needle of Badness I can handle.  When do we start? 

 Morgan:  Hey, there's this car that's been stalking us all night.   Didn't catch who the driver is.   Maybe I'd better skip the Franco Revenge Wedding Fiasco and stay here in case it's either Nina or my dad.   Silas, can you guard Ava with your life and I'll go confront Dad?  

 Kiki:  OMG, Mom!   Someone's stalking the house!   Could it be Nutty Nina?   I can trust Rosalie about as far as I can throw her.   Hey, Franco.  I got you some cuff links for your big day.   I don't know your last name and all so I just got an F for Franco and a C for Carly.   Bye now, and good luck!

Ava:  What if the person in the car isn't Nina?  What if it's SONNY?   He wants me dead as soon as I deliver.  

Carly:  Morning, FIANCE!   Are you ready to walk down the aisle?   No cold feet here.  I'm wearing slippers.   Michael, my favorite child EVER!   You could do no wrong.  You are the chosen one and all the best of me, Sonny, and Jason.  Yes, you had three parents, not counting that no-good drunk AJ.   I like to think you are the product of a menage a trois with me, Sonny, and Jason instead.   Aw, Michael, you don't have to go looking for AJ's killer.  Sometimes it's best to let sleeping dogs lie. 

Franco:  Morning, FIANCEE!   You are going to be calling me lots of other names after our wedding day today.   Just ironing out some final details, like the extra-special wedding video that I know you don't want but you secretly do.   You're not getting cold feet are you?   Hey, Beach, what the hell happened with Heather?   She's an ESSENTIAL part of today's plans.  She puts the REVENGE in Revenge wedding!   Thanks for the cuff links, Kiki!   Even if they do make me late for my own wedding.   By the way, my name is Franco Frank Baldwin...I think.   Shawn, what are you doing here?  You weren't even invited, being Sonny's BFF and all.  

Beach:  About the Heather thing...somebody clocked me and when I came to, she was gone.   Don't know who it was.  Could have been white, BLACK, fat, FIT, female, MALE, he got me from behind.  You'd better make sure Heather's not on the loose or my ass is on the line.  

Shawn:  Boss, the hit on Franco is ready to be carried out.  Jordan, what are you doing here?   I'm busy making BLTs for Heather Webber.   Gotta keep my prisoners well-fed.  Not the what-really-happened-to-TJ's-father thing again!   I oughtta just tell him anyway so you can't threaten me with that anymore.   And I told you, no nookie while you're still dealing.   And if I tell TJ what happened, you're name is just as much mud as mine. 

Jordan:  What are you up to now, Shawn?  Don't think I didn't hear you say "pull the trigger."   So are you gunning for Ava again?   I'm actually here to talk about TJ and how he has misplaced hero worship for you yet he hates my guts.   I can always tell him what really happened between you and his dad.   So you are going to tell him now?  

Sonny:  Shawn, how's FrancoWatch 10-31-14 going?  Let's get this show on the road.   Commissioner Devane, to what do I owe this visit?   What about Ava?  I don't know where she is.   If you really had anything to bring me down, I'd be keeping Mateo company in your squad car.   I wouldn't say RIGHT after the cord was cut.  I'd wait about 30 seconds, just as a professional courtesy.   Just kidding, Commish!   Don't be a stranger, unless you've got the cuffs, that is.  

Anna:  Mr. Corinthos, I need to have a little tete a tete with you about a possible murder.   Who?  Ava Jerome, of course.   The woman who's either pregnant with your child or your grandchild.   Under ordinary circumstances that would be rather unusual, but for Sonny Corinthos, it's just par for the course.  How is Thanksgiving with all your children and their mothers?   Carly, pass the turkey.   Alexis, may I have some cranberry sauce?  Olivia, are there any mashed potatoes left?  Ava?  She won't be around because you're planning on murdering her not five seconds after she gives birth!   If you find her, I do have some questions concerning the murder of Michael's biological father, who also won't be making it to the holiday feast because he is dead.   Stay on the straight and narrow, Mr. C, because you are far from my circle of trust and I'll be watching you.