Nurses' Ball Aftermath: Two Shootings And A Baby

     Another Nurses' Ball is in the books and it was full of the requisite soapy drama.  Here's a rundown of what happened: 

      1. Carly outed Hayden and Ric's ruse. 
      2. Nikolas revealed to Liz that Jake is Jason
      3. Spencer received a beyond-the-grave visit from his mother, Courtney and took off his mask to reveal a much smaller scar than he had expected.
      4. Liz almost fessed up at the Nurses' Ball about Jake's true identity but changed her mind after realizing that if Jake remained in the dark about who he really was, she could have another chance with him. 
       5. Nathan and Ellie's plan worked.  Maxie returned to Nathan and Spinelli returned to Ellie. 
       6. Liz & Jake had sex
       7. Shawn & Jordan had sex
       8. Under pressure from both Julian & Olivia, Sam reluctantly revealed to Julian that he's the father of Olivia's baby. 
       9. Carlos yakked, then struggled with Duke for the gun.  The gun went off and shot Duke. 

      
       Here's the recap for today's show: 

      METROCOURT

      PATRICK:  Olivia, your baby's not going to wait.  You're having it right here, right now. 
      OLIVIA:  Get Julian OUT OF HERE NOW!  
      NED:  You heard the lady, Julian.  Scram, Squeaky and go drink some lemon tea or something. 
      JULIAN:  Some might find this voice sexy.   Right, Alexis?   I wanna see my baby being born! 
      OLIVIA:  Hoo!  Hee!  Hoo!  Hoo!  MAKE  Hee!  Hoo!  JULIAN  Hee! Hoo! Hee!  DISAPPEAR!!!  AAAAAAAGHHH! 
      
       SHAWN'S APARTMENT

        BRUCE:  (shoots gun) BANG!  BANG!  BANG!   That's funny.  Not a scream or anything.  (looks under covers)  Dammit!  All I did was destroy her pillow.  
        JORDAN:  You shot the WRONG person's pillow, tough guy.  Prepare to die.  (Shoots Bruce) 

        PIER 

        SHAWN:  Dammit, Bruce!   I wanted to have more sex with Jordan and you called me here but forget to show up?  
        TJ:  Shawn, what's up, man?   I was just taking a study break so I could wander onto the pier and check out the mob war. 
        SHAWN:  I think you'd better move along, TJ.  There's nothing to see here. 
        TJ:  I don't want to see you or Mom get killed.   You know, this mobbing thing is very dangerous. 
        SHAWN:  You don't say.   You don't have to worry about your mom.  I have her back.  So much that I left her in the apartment with the door unlocked so I can go meet with Duke's goon, who is standing me up at the moment.  

       SABRINA'S APARTMENT

       SABRINA:  Michael, I like you a lot, but you've kissed me three times and in Romance Guide for Port Chucklehead Women, Chapter 2, page 25, it says that after three kisses, you have to grill your guy on his true intentions. 
       MICHAEL:  It's a good thing you're not working in the ELQ office because I couldn't date you by ELQ Employee Relations Code 6-14.  Seeing that your just my baby sister's nanny, those rules do not apply. 
       SABRINA:  That's a good thing.  I guess.  I'm still deciding whether or not I'm into you. 
       MICHAEL:  I'd like to be more than friends, but only if you want to. 
       SABRINA:  Well, you are a good kisser, but no sex until at least the fifth date.  
       MICHAEL:  When was that guidebook written? 1957? 
      
        PARKING GARAGE

       JAKE:  I see blood.  I see a gun.  Someone shot someone!   I hear a noise, so I'd better grab the gun, cuz you never know what danger lurks in a parking garage at night. 
       NATHAN:  Come out with your hands up!  Drop the gun! 
       JAKE:  I'm dropping it.  I didn't do anything.
       NATHAN:  Says the guy with a gun near a small puddle of fresh blood.  
       MAXIE:  Hey, aren't you the guy who tried to blow up the Haunted Star?   Careful, Nathan.  He might be brainwashed. 
       NATHAN:  I'm gonna have to cuff you and haul you in for questioning.  
       JAKE:  Fine, but I just walked in here after some great "Thank God That Hayden Chick Isn't My Wife" sex with the woman I really love and saw blood and a gun.  Then I heard a noise so I had to protect myself. 
       
        METROCOURT

       JULIAN:  (Hears Olivia screaming)  I better make sure my kid isn't ripping her uterus apart. 
       ALEXIS:  It's just good ol' fashioned labor.  I did it three times.  You stay put.  
       JULIAN:  But...But...It's not fair!  I didn't get to see my first two kids being born!  
       ALEXIS:  Julian, you sexy voice-challenged mob kingpin you, sometimes life isn't fair. 
     
       OLIVIA:  Will this kid hurry the hell up!  
       PATRICK:  I see the head.  I think. 
       SAM:  I'm sorry I told my dad he was your baby daddy, Olivia. 
       OLIVIA:  You didn't have much of a choice, did you.  AAAAAAAGH
       PATRICK:  PUSH, Olivia, PUSH!  
       OLIVIA:  AAAAAAGGGGHHHH
       PATRICK:  You have another son, Olivia. 
       OLIVIA:  Why isn't he crying?   Is he...is he...DEAD???? 

        ANNA'S ROOM

       ANNA:  Duke didn't try to shoot Jordan.  I know it.  I'm leaving town with him, Sloane and that's final. 
       SLOANE:  You can't.  I'll miss you too much. 
       ANNA:  Really?  Why do I find that hard to believe?
       SLOANE:  I sorta kinda like you, Anna. 
       ANNA:  That's sweet.  But I'm still leaving with Duke at midnight.  
       SLOANE:  Okay, I guess I can't stop you now. 

       SHAWN'S APARTMENT

       JORDAN:  (on phone)  Anna, you & Sloane need to get over here RIGHT NOW.  

       ANNA:  Jordan, what happened?   Who did you kill?  
       JORDAN:  It was Bruce.   He came in here and tried to kill me but I was in the bathroom so when I got out, I killed him instead.  
        SLOANE:  I knew it!  It WAS Duke!  Bruce is Duke's goon . 
        ANNA:  Come ON, Sloane.  What if Bruce went rogue?  
        SLOANE:  Denial isn't just a river in Egypt, Anna.  Your lover boy is guilty of attempted murder.  
        ANNA:  I've gotta go see Duke. 
        SLOANE:  You've GOT to be kidding me!

         PIER

       ANNA:  Duke?  Where are you, Duke?  
       DUKE:  Anna!  I got shot.   See this blood!  I'm dying! 
       ANNA:  Who shot you? 
       DUKE:  (collapses)