RIP Duke Lavery

     Duke is dead, at least as dead as a soap opera character can be.   Olivia & Julian's premature baby is on his way to the NICU.   Carrrrrrrlos wants his Zabrrrrrina to hide him at her apartment so he can skip town after shooting Duke.  Michael tells Tracy that Ned gave his ELQ shares to Franco to protect Olivia.  Jake is held for questioning at the PCPD about the shooting in the MetroCourt parking garage.   Sloane warns Shawn and Jordan to cease and desist with the mob war. 

      PIER

         ANNA:  Duke, stay with me, Duke!  Who did this to you?   Never mind that, let's go to Scotland where you can wear kilts every day.  You look so sexy in a kilt.   Duke, please hang on. 
         DUKE:  Anna?  I tried...I tried to call the...hit on Jordan...off. 
         ANNA:  Good boy!   It's all right.  I totally forgive you for trying to kill Jordan.   Just stay alive for me so we can run away together.  The ambulance is on its way. 
         DUKE:  I...love you...Anna!  (loses consciousness)

       PCPD

       NATHAN:  So, Doe, when are you going to tell me how the gun and the blood ended up in the MetroCourt parking garage? 
       JAKE:  Let me guess.  Someone was shot. 
       NATHAN:  The question is, who?   Who was shot and who did the shooting?   You work for the Jeromes.  The Jeromes are mobsters.  Ergo, you know something about this and you're not telling.
       JAKE:  If I knew, I'd tell you.   I just fix cars, dude!  
       NATHAN:  Yeah, and I wear this uniform to play cops and robbers.   You shot me and you tried to blow up half the town. 
       JAKE:  I didn't shoot you, my Cassadine brain chip did.   Same goes for the bomb on the boat.   If you want a name, I'll give you one.  Carlos Rivera.   He came to my hotel room and scared the crap out of my fake wife with his ginormous sniper rifle.
 
       SABRINA'S APARTMENT

       CARLOS:  Zabrrrrrrrina!   Hide me.  I'm in big trouble, querrrrrrrrrida.
       SABRINA:  Not AGAIN, Carrrrrrrrrrrrlos!    What did you do this time.
       CARLOS:  I'm skeered of my trial.  They might send me back to da hoosegow.
       SABRINA:  I thought you were all confident that you could get away with shooting Ava. 
       CARLOS:  Not anymore, querrrrrrrrrrida.   Some kid looking for da big dipper saw me on da bridge shooting Ava.  Please hide me, Zabrrrrrrrina!   Just for one night so I can skip town. 
       SABRINA:  Since you said please, okay.  But you have to be GONE by the time Felix gets home tomorrow.  

       JORDAN'S APARTMENT

       JORDAN:  I think Anna and Duke are running away together because they're in LURVE!  
       SLOANE:  She's in "lurve" with the man who ordered a hit on YOU, her informant.
       SHAWN:   I come back from a little 2 a.m. walk on the docks and the cops are here?   What's up with that?
        JORDAN:  (fingers crossed behind back) One of the Jeromes tried to kill me.  I went into badass mode and killed him instead.  
        SHAWN:  Wait 'till I see Julian again.  I'm gonna finish that bastard off!  
        SLOANE:  I hereby declare a moratorium on mobbishness.  No guns.  No murders.  No blood.  No Vengeance.  Got it?  
        SHAWN:  But...But...
        JORDAN:  Understood. 
        SHAWN:  This murder scene is seriously killing the mood, Jordan.  How about we have sex at my place instead.  


       HOSPITAL

       JULIAN:  Hey, receptionist lady, where's my son? 
       RECEPTIONIST:  Have you tried strapping a GPS to him?  
       JULIAN:  He's a premature baby.  It would slip right off of him. 
       RECEPTIONIST:  Fine, what's the mother's name. 
       JULIAN:  Olivia Falconeri.  I had a one night stand with her on New Year's Eve and I sure hope that baby was SORASed while he was still inside her because she's only been preggers for five months. 

        OLIVIA:  My baby!   Please help my baby! 
        JULIAN:  There he is.   I wanna see him!   I wanna see Julian Jerome, Jr.!   DADDY'S COMING, TRIPLE J! 
        NED:  That kid sure as hell isn't going to be named Julian Jerome, Jr.   Alexis, put your lover boy on a leash and don't forget the muzzle!   
        JULIAN:  I'm coming in to be by MY SON'S side.   Deal with it, TED!
      
        ANNA:  Duke!   DUKE!   Stay alive, Duke!   I'm going into that cubicle with him. 
        PATRICK:  Anna, you need to stay out of the cubicle and let us try to save his life. 
        ANNA:  But he can HEAR my words of encouragement and enchanting tales of life in Scotland! 
        PATRICK:  Anna, I am saying this in the kindest way possible.  Get lost! 

        NEONATAL DOC:  Sir, you need to not be here right now.
        JULIAN:  How old are you?  15?   There's no way you are qualified to save my three pounds of future mobster when you look like you should be in Algebra class right now. 
        NEONATAL DOC:  Screw off, squeakypants!  I'm trying to save your kid. 

        ANNA:  Julian Jerome, pepare to be bitch-slapped into next week!  (slaps Julian)  YOU did this to Duke! 
        JULIAN:  Me?   I just came from the hotel, where Olivia and her fake baby-daddy banished me from the room where my son was being born.  
        ANNA:  Don't be smart with me, Jerome!   YOU sent one of your goons after him and I will exact vigilante justice on your arse! 
        ALEXIS:  Julian, please tell me you didn't do a mobby thing like order a hit on Duke! 

        PATRICK:  I'm so sorry, Anna.
        ANNA:  I'm gonna go in there and see for myself.   (goes into Duke's cubicle)  Oh Duke!   You weren't supposed to die on me when we were about to run away to Scotland or Nova Scotia or Newfoundland or some other faraway or not so far away place to flee the mob together.