Santa Claus Rolls His Rs

     A fugitive Santa, a drunken Liz and a marriage proposal...must be Christmas in The Chuckles!   And, let us not forget Paul's booty call with Ava and the appearance of the always-entertaining Dr. Obrecht.   Meanwhile, in Greece, Jerry insists that Robin is dead. 

       METROCOURT

       SAM, LIZ, JASON:  Well THIS is awkward!
       SAM:  I'm just here because my mother's forgetful.
     

        CASSADINE ISLAND

        JERRY:  Your precious Robin is deceased and it's all because of HELena.   It was all her idea.
        ROBERT:  Show us proof, you most foul fellow countryman!
        JERRY:  (pulls out picture of Robin with an apparent gunshot wound) Is this dead enough for you?
        ANNA:  Been there, done that where fake deaths and my daughter are concerned.   I need to see a BODY!
      

        METROCOURT BALLROOM

        SAM:  Looking for something, Mom?
        ALEXIS:  There's that dang check!   Staying around?
        SAM:  Why not?  I'm wearing my FINEST pair of jeans and my BEST leather jacket.   Besides, I'm just dying to see Jason and Elizabeth.

        FRANCO:  Hey you?  Aren't you supposed to be my date?
        LIZ:  Oh yeah.  I keep conveniently forgetting.
        OBRECHT:  Vat aah you doing heah viss Franco, Nuhse Vebber?
        LIZ:  I was just leaving.
        OBRECHT:  You vill do no such sing!   Nobody leaves my LIEBFRAUMILCH in ze lurch!   
      
        LIZ:  Hey Jason, did YOU know that LAURA kept the BIG HUGE SECRET of your identity from you too?   Right, Laura?   Have a slice of blame pie!  There's plenty to go around. 
        JASON:  Methinks you're wasted.
        LIZ:  And what about Nikolas and Hayden?  Even LITTLE JAKE knew!   HA HA HA!   Even my 8 year old, emotionally stunted, possibly brainwashed son knew you were Jason! 
        LAURA:  Let's put a sandwich in that drunken stomach of yours, Elizabeth. 

       JULIAN:  Ladies, I need your permission to pop the question to your mom.   Raise your hand and say "aye" if you're totally cool with me becoming Mr. Alexis Davis.
       SAM:  You KNOW I'm all over that.
       KRISTINA:  Sure, why not?
       JULIAN:  How about you, Molly?   If you don't run screaming from the room, can I take that as a yes?
       MOLLY:  Oh look!   There's Mom now.   Tell her your deep, dark secret, Julian.   Before I change my mind.

        MONICA:  Wow, Michael, it looks like Sabrina's about ready to POP!
        MICHAEL:  Yeah, it looks like this baby took the express train.  Either that, or Sabs has a lot of explaining to do. 

      
    SONNY'S HOUSE

      CARLY:  Aren't you coming to the gala with me?
      SONNY:  I can't.  Something suddenly came up.
      CARLY:  I get it.  You aren't feeling up to partying tonight.
      SONNY:  Nah.  It's just that I have to see if Ava's running guns with Raj.   If she is, we get Avery under our Christmas tree.

   
      METROCOURT BALLROOM

      PAUL:  Dr. Q, prepare to open your checkbook because I've collected 93 guns!   For the amnesty thing.  Yeah, the gun amnesty-slash-sell your guns to the new D.A. program.
      THE TRUTH:  Shame shame shame, Paul Hornsby!  Taking advantage of a charitable event to build your arsenal.  Shaking. My. Head...Vigorously.
      TRACY:  Isn't he the cutest thing you've ever seen?
   
     
       DONATION ROOM

       SANTA CARRRRRRRRRRLOS:  Ho Ho Ho, Querrrrrrida!   When are you gonna tell Michael that Santa Carrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrlos is your baby daddy?  Run away to the North Pole with me!   I've got a big red Mrs. Claus suit waiting for you.
       SABRINA:  Carrrrrrrrrrrrrrlos!  You CAN'T BE HERE!
       SANTA CARRRRRRRRRRRLOS:   You sound like a broken record, Zabrrrrrrrrrrrina! 
       MICHAEL:  I'm coming in! 
       SABRINA:  Michael, meet Santa! 


      OUTSIDE METROCOURT

     ALEXIS:  Julian, if you are back in the mob, I swear I will actually kill you.
     JULIAN:  In light of this not-so-subtle death threat, Alexis Davis, will you marry me?
     ALEXIS:  OMG OMG OMG!  YES!  

   
     SAM:  I wanna be alone
     JASON:  So do I.  Well, sort of.  Can we hang out for a bit?
     SAM:  I guess.  It's not like I've got anything better to do.  Patrick and I are history.
     JASON:  Is it because of me still sorta being your husband?
     SAM:  Kinda.
     JASON:  I'm sorry I didn't believe you when you told me that Elizabeth knew I was Jason. 

   
     SONNY'S HOUSE

      KRISTINA:  Hey Dad, can I take a selfie with you?
      SONNY:  You sure can.  I'll even let you tag me on Facebook AND Instagram.
      KRISTINA:  Hey, we could totally make a VINE!   
   
   
     ROOM 306

     PAUL:  Where's my booty call?  Where's the sex kitten I'm blackmailing with a flash drive recording? 
    AVA:  It's about damn time!   Come here, you hunk of corrupt District Attorney!