Carly chews Liz out for trying to trap Jason. Sam asks Laura about Jake's secret. Nikolas tells Alexis that Helena is dead and buried (Please let Nikolas be lying about the buried part or let the "family plot" be a cryo chamber!). Sam is pissed that Patrick is pushing her to divorce Jason. Maxie and a fellow fashionista give Nina a makeover. Franco (correctly) suspects that Julian is setting Nina up.
CRIMSON OFFICE
JULIAN: Nina, you kinda suck at being a magazine editor. Shape up or ship out.
MAXIE: You're not going to be a mean, scroogey boss and fire her are you? Because I can totally fix her.
NINA: Fix me?
WYNDEMERE
NIKOLAS: Yes, Aunt Alexis. Helena is dead and I pushed the dirt onto her myself.
ALEXIS: Where's the champagne? I want to pop a cork and do the chicken dance on her grave.
GHOST HELENA: Oh, poor, mousy Natasha! Naivete is only endearing in the young. I shall haunt you in the afterlife and upon my return to this world.
HOSPITAL
LIZ: What do YOU want, Carly?
CARLY: I want you to set Jason free from that little trap you set for him. You know, the "Operation Domesticate Jason Morgan" trap. Jason will NOT be tamed, fenced in, or de-mobbed.
LIZ: WhatEVER, Carly! Jason LOVES me and he LOVES my boys. He doesn't even REMEMBER being Sonny's top goon.
CARLY: Which is just peachy with you, isn't it? But it ain't Jason. Jason Morgan is a danger-loving killbot for the best mob kingpin that ever existed and don't you forget that.
PATRICK AND SAM'S HOUSE
SAM: So, Laura, I had a little chat with Jake and he told me you and Elizabeth have a BIG HUGE SECRET about Jason. Care to elaborate?
LAURA: You're taking the word of an 8 year old?
SAM: And you've NEVER had a kid overhear something before?
LAURA: What did he say?
SAM: That he heard you and Elizabeth talking about Jason and that you were kind of pissed at her about some big secret she was keeping from him. Did the Cassadines implant something else in him besides that mind-control chip? Can he fly? Levitate? Speak 20 different languages? Split off into two separate, identical bodies like an amoeba?
HOSPITAL
PATRICK: What's up, Jason? Divorce Sam yet?
JASON: Mind your own business much, doc?
PATRICK: You need to divorce Sam so I can marry her. Oh, and stay away from her so she doesn't get confused and start talking about dragons and phoenixes again.
JASON: Whoa, dude, are you SERIOUSLY that insecure?
LIZ: You just want Jason to be your Mr. Fix-It and do damage control while you make like Miley Cyrus and swing through Port Chuckles on a wrecking ball.
CARLY: Enjoy Jason while you have him in your cozy little cocoon of lies because when he finds his Jason Morgan-ness again and finds out you knew who he was and didn't tell him, he will dump your ass so fast he'll be at Sam's doorstep even before he leaves yours.
METROCOURT
FRANCO: Hey Julian, by any chance are you setting Nina up to--I don't know--run Crimson into the ground while simultaneously falling on her ass?
JULIAN: What? Me? Set Nina up? Are you still on your wacked-out mother's LSD? I felt sorry for Nina because of the coma and her wacked-out mother, so it was a pity hire. You happy now?
FRANCO: If you're setting her up, I just might remember my days as a serial killer. Funny how things just come back to you.
CRIMSON OFFICE
NINA: OMG, Maxie, I have NO FRIGGIN' CLUE what I'm doing. I don't know how to Editor-in-Chief a magazine at all.
MAXIE: Remember how I said I was going to give you a makeover? I invited my fashionista friend Graffiti over and we're going to make YOU all Crimsony.
WYNDEMERE
ALEXIS: Is it just me or is The Dragon Lady rubbing off on you, Nikolas?
NIKOLAS: So I put a little something-something in her tea. You're welcome.
CRIMSON OFFICE
NINA: (looking in the mirror) Who the hell is THAT?
MAXIE: That is YOU. It's Nina 2.0!
NINA: No WAY! I look like I was dipped in a tub of AWESOME!
JULIAN: (looking at Nina) Who the hell is THAT?
NINA: It's me 2.0. My creator and I need more money because, Mr. Scroogey Man, awesomeness doesn't come cheap.
JULIAN: Yeah, good luck with that. Try gofundme.
NINA: I could totally go fund MYSELF. I just remembered I'm LOADED!
WYNDEMERE
LAURA: Threat level RED! Sam's onto us! Or she will be very soon. We're SCREWED, Nikolas!
PATRICK AND SAM'S HOUSE
SAM: Mom, what are you doing here?
ALEXIS: I'm here to help Patrick divorce you and Jason.
SAM: Say WHAAAAAAAAAAAT?
LIZ'S HOUSE
LIZ: I've been doing a lot of thinking, Jason and I only need the light when it's burning low. I only miss the sun when it starts to snow and I only know I love you when I let you go.
JASON: Say WHAAAAAAAAAAAT?
"ALEXIS: Where's the champagne? I want to pop a cork and do the chicken dance on her grave."
ReplyDeleteHahahaha. She DID do a little dance, too bad it wasn't the chicken dancea! :)
"GHOST HELENA: Oh, poor, mousy Natasha! Naivete is only endearing in the young. I shall haunt you in the afterlife and upon my return to this world."
ROFL!
"SAM: That he heard you and Elizabeth talking about Jason and that you were kind of pissed at her about some big secret she was keeping from him. Did the Cassadines implant something else in him besides that mind-control chip? Can he fly? Levitate? Speak 20 different languages? Split off into two separate, identical bodies like an amoeba?"
ROFL! Yes! All the above! :)
LIZ: I've been doing a lot of thinking, Jason and I only need the light when it's burning low. I only miss the sun when it starts to snow and I only know I love you when I let you go"
ROFL! Is that really a song? :)