Friday, November 7, 2014

Have Gun, Will Gab

 Here goes Friday in The Chuckles!  Still last Friday in their world, but Friday just the same...

  Michael:  Dad!  Or should I just call you Sonny now.   I know what YOU DID!  It was BAD ENOUGH YOU AND MOM HAD SEX ON MY COUCH BUT YOU KILLED AJ AND MOM COVERED IT UP!!!  Ava, shut the hell up, I'm trying to talk my faux father to death while waving a gun at him here!   Just make a run for it now, Ava, 'cuz he won't shoot you while I'm trying to shoot him.   Ok, now we got rid of her, YOU HAVE TO PAY!!!  Yes, I learned that phrase from you, SONNY!   That and DEAD TO ME, which I used earlier today with Mom.   Just for the hell of it, why don't you tell me why you killed my REAL DAD, AJ?   You mean to tell me he DIDN'T KILL CONNIE AND YOU SHOT HIM ANYWAY?   AND HE WAS UNARMED?    That's EVEN WORSE!!!    Dammit, I'm trying to shoot you but either the trigger's stuck or I just don't have it in me.   But I promised AJ I'd make whoever killed him pay, so I need to stall a bit more.  

  Ava:  Michael!   Thank God you're coming to my rescue.   Kill Sonny before he kills me.   You're really mad at him, aren't you?   He killed AJ in cold blood.  Stop yammering and KILL HIM ALREADY!!!   Ok, I'm getting out of here.   Oh, God, this escape is not going to be easy.   Oh, please don't let me run anyone over and make him lose his memory and need plastic surgery like the last time you had to escape a dangerous Sonny-related situation.   Ok, Ava, you're out of the Brownstone, now get somewhere you can be rescued.   There's Franco.  Franco, HELP ME!   Oh! Ugh!  Losing.  Consciousness. (comes to and sees Silas and Kiki)  Silas?  Kiki?   I need h-e-e-lp.  Nina.  Nina.  Did.  This.  To.  Me.

 Sonny:  Michael!  What are you doing interrupting my murder of Ava.  Ava, you stay still.   Look, you're angry.  I can explain.   Dammit, she's gone!  Ava killed Connie, Michael, and she needed to pay.   Yes, AJ was innocent.   YES, I SHOT THE WRONG GUY!   YES, I HATED AJ!   I know you're angry son and you have a right to be.  You don't want to do this.  You are my son.  I love you. 

 Dante:  Thanks, Nathan, but I can handle Sonny.   I knew this day would come when I'd have to arrest my own flesh and blood.  You too?  What Obrecht do?  Oh, your mother-aunt.   Good luck man.   Morgan, where's Sonny?   I need to arrest him for murder.   No, not that murder, the murder of AJ Quartermaine.   Michael?   I saw him at Sonny's.  He was acting a little strange.   I'm afraid he's going to get the drop on our dad before I can arrest him.   Let's go find the both of them. 

Morgan:  I'm sorry, Kiki, but Dad asked me where Ava was and I was about to become closer to being his favorite son so I told him.   That and I found out she killed Connie.   But I told Dad not to kill her, if that counts for anything.   Dante, what's up bro?   I'm kinda worried about Michael.   Kiki said he's gone off the deep end and she hasn't heard from him.   I don't think Michael would actually KILL Dad, even if he did find out all that stuff.  You think he might?   We gotta find him then. 

Nina:  Rockabye Zyrtec on the tree top.  When the wind blows, the cradle will rock.  Mommy, why is this song about a baby falling out of a tree?   Oh, and did you pay Ava to seduce Silas?   Tell me or you don't get your MONEY!    (answers phone).  Hi Franco.  How was the Revenge Wedding.   Guess what?   I have a BABY now!   I can't wait for you to meet her.   Yeah, I miss hanging out with you too because you get my craziness because you're crazy too.   Ok, Mommy.  ANSWERS!    Hey, even I know Baby Zyrtec doesn't understand English yet.   She's just 4 months old!    Silas is OFF the LIST now and you're BACK ON IT!   I can't wait for Silas to meet his new daughter.  OF COURSE SHE'S MY BABY!  WHO ELSE'S WOULD SHE BE?  

Madeline:  Here's the food and here's the baby stuff.   Where's my THANK YOU, Nina?   Yes, if you want the truth, I did pay Ava to seduce Silas because I wanted you away from him.   You happy now?   You know, this little girl is not really yours, Nina. 

Franco:  Ok, what to do, what to do.  Think, Franco.  Ok, call Nina and see if she has any crazy schemes to get rid of Carly, my mother, Sonny's goomba, and the curly-haired lady in one fell swoop.   Hi Nina.  How is life on your side of Crazytown.   Oh, THE WEDDING, it was...eventful.   I kinda miss hanging with my bestie.   I'd love to meet the kid too, but my schedule's kinda booked right now, with a bunch of hostages and everything.  Catch ya later.   Hey, mother of the cheating tramp, can I buy you a drink?   Guess not.   I gave the footage to my dad and he was never happier to be in possession of an incriminating sex tape.  Oh, Carly won't need a lawyer where she's going.  

Bobbie:  Oh, God!  What's going to happen to MY DAUGHTER!   Shut up, Lucy!   I've got bigger fish to fry right now.  So now you're all over DUKE.   Good luck to him.   Bye Lucy.  Don't let the door hit you on the way out.   If it isn't the man who destroyed my daughter and grandson's lives.   I'm going to find CARLY a good lawyer.   What do you MEAN, she won't need a lawyer?  

Lucy:  Anna!   Stop arresting Duke!   He's my honey now!   Duke, you can do better than her!   Hugs and kisses!   Bobbie, did you see what just happened?  ANNA just arrested the MAN SHE LOVES!   How can she do that!   She must not really love him like I do.   Nah, Duke and I are just friends.  With benefits.   Ta-ta, Bubbie! 

 Anna:  Duke, some evidence has turned up implicating Sonny in the murder of AJ Quartermaine.   That means YOU LIED and I have to arrest you and read you your rights.   (back at the police station) Duke, HOW COULD YOU CHOOSE SONNY OVER ME!    Was your relationship with a FORMER BUSINESS ASSOCIATE worth your freedom?   Well, you're going to jail and we are FINISHED!  

Duke:  Go ahead, arrest me.   Yes, I lied to protect Sonny.  Sonny gave me a job and made me feel useful!   Sonny hated Julian Jerome just as much as I did.  As WE DID, ANNA!   I couldn't throw him under the bus in exchange for my freedom.   I have him my word and I kept my word.   I'm prepared to face the consequences. 

Nathan:  Hey, Dante.  I know what you're going through with the having to arrest a family member thing.   I have to arrest my mother.  No, not that mother, my other mother.  My mother-aunt, Madeline, for conspiring with my sister-cousin Nina to do violent things to somebody.   Man, my family is messed up.   Silas, any word on Nina?   She HAS done something terrible?   We've got to find her.  

Silas:  Hey, Kiki, what's the hurry.   I thought Morgan was with Ava.  We've got to go find her.  Ava!   Ava, we're here.   What happened?  Who did this to you?   We need to get her to the hospital. 

Kiki:  Dad, I thought you were with Mom.  No, Morgan's here, at the hospital.  We need to go find Mom.  I don't think she sent that text.   Mom!   Are you okay?   Who did this to you?  




  

3 comments:

  1. "Michael: Ava, shut the hell up, I'm trying to talk my faux father to death while waving a gun at him here!"

    ROFL! It was funny. Sonny was pointing a gun at Ava, while Michael was pointing a gun at Sonny! :) Damn forgot to mention that on Karen's blog haha. Ah well. :)


    "Nina: Rockabye Zyrtec on the tree top. When the wind blows, the cradle will rock. Mommy, why is this song about a baby falling out of a tree?"

    ROFL! Keep singing crazy eyed Nina! :)

    "Kiki: Dad, I thought you were with Mom. No, Morgan's here, at the hospital. We need to go find Mom. I don't think she sent that text. Mom! Are you okay? Who did this to you?"

    You forgot her out of breathness! ROFL!

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  2. That was a very GH moment: Michael waving the gun while chatting with Sonny, interrupting Sonny's waving his gun while chatting with Ava. Guns are, apparently, the de rigeur conversation prop in The Chuckles these days.

    I should have thrown in a reference to Kiki climbing GH's Mount Everest, a la Jake/NuJason and added pauses for panting.

    Waiting not so patiently for Helena to reappear again so she can make her General Hilarity debut. She's one of the few characters who haven't appeared here yet. I don't think I've had Nik or Britt in the blog yet either.

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  3. "I should have thrown in a reference to Kiki climbing GH's Mount Everest, a la Jake/NuJason and added pauses for panting."

    Hahahaha. Too bad you didn't. :)

    "Waiting not so patiently for Helena to reappear again so she can make her General Hilarity debut. She's one of the few characters who haven't appeared here yet. I don't think I've had Nik or Britt in the blog yet either."

    The actress who plays Britch has been put on recurring now. :( I can't wait for Helena! :)

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