The Nina Whisperer

Who talks some sense and sanity into Nina?   Ironically it's her co-crazy Franco.  Whodathunkit?   Ava and Silas set off in search of Baby Zyrtec, Breakfast with the Qs includes a few special guest stars, none of which are Nik and Britt, who are breakfasting at Kelly's.  Patrick and Sam send Lulu off on a job babysitting Larry, Obrecht goes all Cheshire Cat when Agent Sloane shows up to serve Anna notice, and Julian gets some visitors in lockup. 

 FRANCO:  What do we have here in the ToddJulian Times?  Ava on the run?   Intriguing...  Oh, good morning Nina.  I'm hungry.  How 'bout you?   I could serve you up a piping hot, fresh-from-the-oven plate of REALITY for breakfast?  Isn't reality tasty?   I'm getting aromas of NACHO BABY and SILAS's sausage says that your marriage is OVER EASY.   The truth totally SUCKS, doesn't it?   I should know.  I was fed some CARLY bread that went all too well with SONNY'S PEPPERONI!   It's okay, Nina.  You'll be okay after the initial bout of indigestion.  Once it all gets out of your system, you'll feel just like new and I'LL BE THERE FOR YOU.   You know, 'CAUSE YOU'RE THERE FOR ME TOO!   Was "Friends" before or after you went into that coma?   

NINA:   Franco, WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY BED?   I'm a MARRIED WOMAN!   If Silas finds out I'm SLEEPING WITH ANOTHER MAN, it will be OVER!   Look at Baby Zyrtec.  So peaceful.  This is MY BABY!   MY BEAUTIFUL 12 POUND PREEMIE BABY GIRL!   Stop it Franco.  Stop saying she's not my baby!   What's this nonsense?   Why does this newspaper say the baby belongs to Ava Jerome?  She's MY BABY, Franco!   MY BABY ZYRTEC!   Silas loves me and things are really good between us.  OMG, they're not!  Silas and I had a big fight!   Silas said my marriage is over!   OMG, I put a needle into Ava and I took her baby!  But I DESERVE THAT BABY!   My baby was RIPPED FROM MY WOMB because of that bitch!   If Silas and I had been strong enough, he would have been able to stop my mother from killing my BABY!   OMG, Franco!   If I don't have Silas and I don't have Baby Zyrtec, I don't have ANYONE!  I'm EMPTY!    I have you?  That's so sweet, Franco.  What are we going to do?  What are we going to do with the BABY?  

AVA:  (reading newspaper) I can't let Silas see this!  As far as he knows, I'm on the run from the mob.  As far as he knows, I didn't kill Connie and I'm not a fugitive from the law.   Silas!  Oh, I'm just worried about MY BABY!   She's out there with two crazies and she's only a 12-pound preemie!   Where could they be?  I don't know where to begin to look.   No, don't call Sam.  She's no fan of me and she's friends with Sonny.  She could tip off Sonny's goombas.  Besides, I hear she's out chasing fake Quartermaines.  Yeah, yeah, it takes one to know one.   No, YOU have to go with me to find the baby.   If you do, I'll name her after you.  How does Silasine sound?  Thank you, Silas.  I knew I could count on you. Let's go NOW! 

SILAS:  Ava, is something wrong?  Yes, I know you're worried about your baby.  I have an idea.  Let's call Sam.  She's a private investigator and she has the resources to locate Nina, Franco, and the baby.  Why don't you want to call Sam?   I don't know the first thing about being a P.I.   Yes, I want to find Nina and you want to find your baby.  Alright, I'll go with you.   When do you want to leave?

OLIVIA:  WHERE'S YOUR SISTER!    She KILLED MY COUSIN!   She shot and KILLED HER!   She did it to protect YOU!   Where did you stash AVA, Julian?   I know you had to have helped her escape!   WHAT?   SHE SHOT ME TOO?  And YOU KNEW?   Oh, Ned, I didn't know you had company.  Sorry for barging in on a Q family breakfast, but I was just talking to YOUR EX BOYFRIEND, Alexis.  He's in the clink.  The commish is holding him on suspicion of aiding and abetting.   Hi Mr Ashton.  Nice to meet you.  

JULIAN:  I swear, Olivia, I don't know where my sister is.   Despite the commish's suspicions, I did NOT help her escape the hospital.   Anna Devane and I have a long history and none of it is good.   She will arrest me if I look at her funny.  All I know is that Ava shot you.  I just found out from Commissioner Devane that she killed your cousin.   Yes, it was Ava who shot you.  Lucas!   Long time, no see.  It does a father good to see his son visit him in the slammer, even if said father is in the slammer unjustly.   Yeah, Anna Devane thinks I helped your aunt Ava skip town.   Or she just didn't like my shoes.   Alexis and I are through, son.  She has a problem with me not being upfront about who I'm working for.   I sure would like to tell her everything, but look what happened when I tried to leave the mob.  You got shot.   No, it wasn't Ric Lansing.   So how are you and Brad doing?    Good to hear.   Alexis!  Are you a sight for sore abs! 

LUCAS:   Hey, Julian--still getting used to the whole Dad thing.   I'm here to tell you that I believe you when you say you didn't help Ava escape.  It's wrong that the commish is holding you here.   Should I call Alexis for you?  Why?  What happened between the two of you?   You really had something good going.   Why don't you just tell her who your head honcho is?   I thought Ric Lansing shot me.   Brad and I are doing great.   Thanks for asking.  Look, I'm in your corner, Julian.  

ALEXIS:  Breakfast with the Quartermaines.  How can I refuse?   Nice to meet you, Mr. Ashton.   I assume he's not putting down roots of the dental sort.   What do you know, the Brit appreciates my wit!  I was Dobson.  It's a long story.  About 10 years ago...or was it 11...no, Kristina's, like 21 now...damn SORAS, confusing things...anyway, my daughter was a baby and I had killed a mobster guy so I lost custody of her.  Ned watched the baby with his girlfriend Skye and the only way I could see my daughter was to dress up as the butler.  That is how Dobson came about.  Olivia, what are you doing here?   Julian's in JAIL?   Thanks for breakfast.  Gotta go.   Hello, Julian. 

 NED:  Cancel your dental appointment, Pops!  Your chompers look just fine for someone from across the pond.   Sit down to a Q family breakfast with Mother, Alexis and me.   How many times do we have to tell you, Father, there is NO HOBSON!   Our housekeeper's name is Alice.  Olivia!  What brings you to the House of Q?  

LORD LARRY ASHTON:   Jerry, I have here in my hot little hand a key to the safe deposit box that contains our solution to the Luke Spencer problem.   As soon as the bank opens, I plan to retrieve it myself.   Hello, my lovely ex-wife!  This?   It's just a key to the liquor cabinet in the butler's pantry.   Always be able to get your hands on the booze, that's my motto.   If it isn't my son and his beautiful lady friend!   Hey, son, if you get tired of her, send her my way!   I must get going.  I have a dental appointment this morning.  Have to keep the sparkle in my smile!   Oh, this Alexis is keeper!   Alright, we'll sit down for some breakfast, but then I'll be on my merry way.   By the way, where is Hobson?  Dobson?   If her name is Alice, who is Hobson?   How about Dobson?   So, Alexis, you snuck around incognito and no Quartermaine was the wiser?   You would make a splendid partner in crime!   Who's this one?   Neddie, you've been busy!   Oh, the pleasure is all mine!    It's been fun, but I really must be going.  

TRACY:  So you've already found a DENTIST?   You must be putting down roots here.  Stay, ex-hubby and have a Q breakfast.  

PATRICK:  Thanks for meeting us here, Lulu.   Here's what we know so far.  Larry "The Lush" Ashton is indeed working with Jerry.  We overheard them talking on the phone about "the Luke Spencer problem"   The answers we are looking for are in a safe deposit box.   The bank doesn't open for an hour and we need to get there before he does. 

SAM:  We had a key made to the safe deposit box.  You won't believe how we were able to do that.  SILLY PUTTY!  I made an impression of the key with the putty and the locksmith was able to make a copy.   So your job is to distract the self-titled Lord Ashton while we go get the information from the safe deposit box.  

 LULU:  What's the latest and greatest on the search for my father?  So Larry Ashton is working with Jerry!   Silly putty!  Who would have guessed?   Wait a minute, if you both have a key, what if he gets there before you do?   Okay, I'll do it.  Anything to get answers about my father, even if they are not the answers I want.  

ANNA:  Liesl, what are you doing in my office!   Get out right now or I'll find a home for you downstairs!   Again with your Cesaaah!  Don't you ever get tired of this?   What do you mean I am going to prison?   Agent Sloane?   You can't tell me with a straight face that you take this sociopath's crazy ramblings seriously!   You might want to rethink that.   After all, how are you going to charge me for murder when Cesar Faison is alive?  

OBRECHT:   (Turning around in Anna's chair with a Cheshire Cat grin on her face)  Surprise!   I have some bad news for you, Commissioner Devane.   You aah headed to Pentonville.   Vy?   For murdering my Cesaaaah, of course!   It is not me who vill take you down.   I have help.  You killed him and you vill not get away viss it!   Agent Sloane, srow ze book at her! 

AGENT SLOANE:  I'm baaaaack!   I have something for you, my former mentor.   You acted outside the law in the murder of Cesar Faison and his daughter has decided to press charges.  Here is a subpoena.  Anna Devane, you've been served.  

NIKOLAS:  I have tried a lot of interesting food in my time, most of which heavily featured feta, but this is a first.  A BLT omelet.   Who came up with such a thing?   It's actually not half bad.  I could get hooked on those.   I'm guessing you ordered the Awful Waffles.   You haven't touched them.   What's eating you?  Yes, pun intended.   We Cassadines actually do have a sense of humor.  Okay, some of us do.   For the record, you made the right decision not pursuing charges against Anna Devane.   You changed your mind?   Sure, I support you, but I'm curious.  What made you change your mind?   Yes, I do know all about crazy families.  My grandmother and your father go way back.  

BRITT:   What's a BLT omelet?   Who puts lettuce in an omelet?   Spinach, yes.  But lettuce?  That's all kinds of CRAZY!   I'm fine.   Everything is fine.   Awful Waffles is just an ironic name.  Oh, I changed my mind.  I decided to help that Fed investigate what happened to my father.   He was an international terrorist, among other things, but he was my father.  You know how demented families work.  Case in point, your father Stavros.  Tell me, is he frozen or unfrozen now?   I keep losing track.   Anyway, I don't want to be always wondering what happened to him.   Besides, it's never a good idea to piss off my "mutter".