Prop of the day: The Pee Stick. Rather, Sabrina's shoebox full of them, except for the one Valerie picked up by mistake, dropped, and ended up in Nathan's hands. Don't worry, it's still in the box! No pee has touched it...yet.
Dante & Lulu make a decision about their future. Dillon has a rough day on set. Paul Hornsby holds court in his office, hosting first Tracy, then Michael, then Dillon. Olivia returns to town and is having second thoughts about keeping the baby away from Julian. Alexis has an important question for Julian.
OUTSIDE KELLY'S
VALERIE: (over the phone) Dillon, please keep my secret about sleeping with Dante. Pretty please with a cherry on top!
DILLON: I don't like cherries.
VALERIE: Fine, a strawberry, a blueberry, a raspberry, whatever the hell kind of fruit you want, just keep my one night stand with Dante on the down low.
DILLON: But Dante was a bad, bad husband for cheating on Lulu.
VALERIE: You tell Lulu and you ruin her life, you ruin Dante's life, and you ruin my life because Lulu will un-cousin me!
HOSPITAL LOBBY
DANTE: I'm worried about how Sonny will handle his paralysis. Let's have another baby.
LULU: Now there's a non-sequitor.
DANTE: I'm serious. I want another kid.
LULU: Like, for real? As in get the embryo out of the freezer and put it in my uterus for real? Or is this because you kissed Valerie.
DANTE: (to himself) This is totally a make-up-for-cheating-on-you baby. (to Lulu) This is totally not a... make-up-for-kissing-Valerie baby.
HAUNTED STAR
NATHAN: Hands off my girlfriend or this little movie thing...not happening!
DILLON: Ever heard of acting?
MAXIE: Don't mind Nathan. He's just jealous of my fake movie sex with you that never actually happened.
DILLON: Next time you bring your guard dog along, don't forget the muzzle.
JULIAN'S HOTEL ROOM
JULIAN: Wakey wakey, Alexis! Here's what's on the agenda for this morning. Number one, sex. Number two, bacon. Number three, a present for you.
ALEXIS: Time's a wastin'! Sex was first, right?
HOSPITAL LOBBY
OLIVIA: OMG! Dante! My baby! How's Sonny?
DANTE: Not so light on his feet, but he's alive. How's my invisible baby brother?
OLIVIA: Not so invisible anymore. He's at the MetroCourt with a nanny.
DANTE: He's in the same city as Julian? Not a good idea.
OLIVIA: Are you sure? What if Julian really is 100% mob-free?
DANTE: Yeah, and I'm a Red Sox fan.
PAUL'S OFFICE
TRACY: Here's a present for you.
PAUL: And it isn't even my birthday! Like sands through the hourglass...wait a minute, that only happens in some place called Salem.
TRACY: Well, I wasn't going to give you a hospital!
PAUL: Point taken.
TRACY: Have you talked some sense into Michael yet? Have you told him he needs to disown Sonny again?
PAUL: So much for a gift with no strings attached. I'll get to it.
HAUNTED STAR
DILLON: I...uh...Lulu...Marjorie...Maxie...CUT! SCREW YOU, LULU! Way to ruin my concentration with your mere presence on set! Take five. Or fifteen. Take an hour. I am walking off the set. I REPEAT, I AM WALKING OFF THE SET!
LULU: Was it something I said?
MAXIE: Well...
LULU: Maxie...
MAXIE: Dammit, Lulu, he has ALL THE LOVE FEELS for you!
KELLY'S
VALERIE: Must. Get. Donuts. Now.
SABRINA: Hi, Valerie. Remember me? Nurses' Ball?
MICHAEL: I've gotta go say hey to the D.A. Maybe he has Carrrrrrrlos's head on a silver platter. Sorry, Sabrina.
VALERIE: Okay, donuts, check. Coffee, check. Fake Twizzlers, check. I'm outta here.
JULIAN'S HOTEL ROOM
JULIAN: And here's your present. Molly even tolerated my presence long enough to help me. ALEXIS: A scrapbook. How very un-mobster of you! Move in with me.
JULIAN: Are you sure Molly won't disown you?
ALEXIS: I think you're growing on her.
PAUL'S OFFICE
MICHAEL: Where's Rivera?
PAUL: This is not about Sonny's shooter, Michael. This is about you not becoming Sonny's number one goon.
MICHAEL: I see an hourglass, so that can only mean one thing. Tracy sent you after me. DAMMIT!
SABRINA'S APARTMENT
SABRINA: Dammit, I've gotta take that pee test. How did my pregnancy test turn into a box of fake Twizzlers? Good thing I have about 15 more pee sticks in this here shoebox. You can never be too sure. (doorbell rings)
TRACY: Remember me? Your BFF? With whom you were supposed to have breakfast?
SABRINA: CRAP!
MICHAEL: DAMMIT, Tracy, why did you have to go sic the D.A. on me? Sonny is my father and I'll do his dirty work if I WANT to do his dirty work. Besides, you never liked A.J. anyway.
PAUL'S OFFICE
DILLON: Dad, I'm having a terrible, horrible, no-good, very bad day and it's all Detective West's fault. Can you give him forty lashes with a wet noodle or something?
PAUL: I'll consider it. What did the detective do to make your day so terrible, horrible, no-good, and very bad?
DILLON: He got all possessive about my co-star. Well, he is her boyfriend, but he threatened to shut down my movie if I had fake sex with Maxie. Plus, I'm in love with a married woman.
PAUL: I'll see about procuring a wet noodle, but the forbidden woman, that one's up to you.
OUTSIDE KELLY'S
NATHAN: You run along, Valerie. I'll pick up your donuts, buy some more and eat one or two on my way. What's this? (Picks up bag with pee stick box) HOLY CRAP!
JULIAN'S HOTEL ROOM
ALEXIS: You're off the hook, Julian! No charges, no trial! Just pack your bags and move into my penthouse already. I'd better see you at my home after work. (leaves)
JULIAN: (opens door) Olivia. Baby. Say WHAAAAAT?
PCPD
NATHAN: Check out what's in this bag Valerie dropped outside Kelly's, along with all our donuts. (shows Dante the pregnancy test)
DANTE: CRAAAAAAAAAAAAP!
"Prop of the day: The Pee Stick."
ReplyDeleteSo true so true!!!! Too bad you didn't have it talk hahaha!
"JULIAN: Wakey wakey, Alexis! Here's what's on the agenda for this morning. Number one, sex. Number two, bacon."
How about combining sex with bacon? ROFL! Oh wait he isn't George Constanza! :)
" PAUL: And it isn't even my birthday! Like sands through the hourglass...wait a minute, that only happens in some place called Salem."
ROFL!
"DILLON: I...uh...Lulu...Marjorie...Maxie...CUT! SCREW YOU, LULU!"
Hahahahahaha!
"VALERIE: Okay, donuts, check. Coffee, check. Fake Twizzlers, check."
Fake twizzlers?!!?!? ROFL!
"JULIAN: (opens door) Olivia. Baby. Say WHAAAAAT? "
Baby Leo is no longer invisible!!! YAY! :)
"So true so true!!!! Too bad you didn't have it talk hahaha!"
ReplyDeleteI know, I should have, but there were just so many of them! They'd take over the show! Which reminds me, I forgot to put in a scene about Nathan picking up the pee stick he thought belonged to Val and giving it to Dante.
"I know, I should have, but there were just so many of them! They'd take over the show!"
ReplyDeleteHahahaha.that would be awesome! :)
"Which reminds me, I forgot to put in a scene about Nathan picking up the pee stick he thought belonged to Val and giving it to Dante."
Hahaha ooops! :) You can add it in today's episode.
"Hahaha ooops! :) You can add it in today's episode. "
ReplyDeleteI added it in late last night. There was too much going on in that eppy to remember it all the first time. LOL
Hahahaha. I've been there! :)
ReplyDelete" NATHAN: Check out what's in this bag Valerie dropped outside Kelly's, along with all our donuts. (shows Dante the pregnancy test)
ReplyDeleteDANTE: CRAAAAAAAAAAAAP!"
ROFL! That's probably what Dante was thinking! :)