Dark Side

     Anna is shocked that Nikolas has a dark side.  Said dark side tells Rosalie that she will meet with Nina and bribe her for the ELQ shares, but bring the shares back to Nikolas instead of Michael.   Meanwhile, Franco tries to convince Nina that her new hubby Ric has a dark side.   Nathan tries to do the same and Nina accuses Nathan and Franco of being in cahoots.   Ric meets with Madeline and she's none too happy that he married Nina.   Delia concocts a story about Denise being Ava's fraternal twin.   Luke's return shocks Lulu and Tracy. 

     ANNA'S ROOM

        SLOANE:  Nikolas Cassadine helped me rig the election.  
        ANNA:  I don't think so.  Nikolas is The Good Cassadine.   He is nothing like his nefarious grandmother. 
        SLOANE:  I wouldn't bet on it.   When he realized he couldn't corrupt Felicia, he switched to Team Lomax on a dime.  
         ANNA:  But...But...But Nikolas was my daughter's FRIEND!  
         SLOANE:  I'm sorry to tell you this, but the poisoned apple doesn't fall far from the tree.  

     Q MANSION

          ROSALIE:  (over the phone):  I have to talk to you about ELQ. 
          TRACY:  Fee Fi Fo Fum.  Look out, Rosalie, here I come. 
          NIKOLAS: (over the phone) Is that Tracy?   Run, Rosalie, RUN!  
          ROSALIE:  (over the phone) Gotta go!  Catch ya later!  
          TRACY:  Spill it, young lady.  With whom were you gossiping about ELQ? 
          ROSALIE:  I wasn't gossiping, Ms. Q.  I was only following Michael's orders that I extort ELQ shares out of Nina Clay.  THAT was who I was talking to if you must know.  
          TRACY:  What the hell does that whackjob ex-boss of yours have to do with ELQ anyway? 
          ROSALIE:  Hello?  Did you not get the memo from your son Ned, who gave Franco his ELQ shares?   Franco and Nina have some sort of weird friends-with-benefits relationship.  The less I know about it, the better.  Anyway, the only way to get to Franco is through Nina and since I used to work for that nut, I get to be the one to sweet-talk her out of those shares.  You happy now? 
 
       PCPD

        SONNY:  Delia, what the hell are you doing here?   Trying to bail your precious Ava out again? 
        DELIA:   This is my daughter you're talking about.  
        DENISE:  This Irish broad ain't mah mothah!  
        DELIA:  I'm afraid I am, honey.   You're Ava's fraternal twin. 
        JULIAN, ALEXIS, KIKI, MORGAN, SONNY:  Say WHAAAAAAAAAAAAT?   

     METROCOURT

        FRANCO:  Where's the hubs, Nina?  
        NINA:  None of your beeswax, Franco.  
        FRANCO:  And here I thought you newlyweds couldn't get enough of each other.  
        NINA:  Oh, we're doing the nasty, the dirty deed, the horizontal tango, the electric boogaloo!   We've been doing so much of it that poor Ric is WORN OUT!  
         FRANCO:  Oh, I get it.  He's out emptying your bank account as we speak.  
         NINA:  As if!   I can't even GET to my money and he can't either.  

      PENTONVILLE

       MADELINE:  When are you going to get me sprung from this joint?   They've got me talking like a prisoner now.  
        RIC:  What happened to those fancy-pants lawyers of yours?   
        MADELINE:  They were incompetent morons, so I fired them and hired YOU, remember?   The sooner you get your hands on Nina's money, the sooner I'm a free woman.  Prison facials are the ABSOLUTE WORST! 
        RIC:  Have no fear, Madeline.  I married your daughter.  
        MADELINE:  Say WHAAAAAAAAAAAT?   


     Q MANSION

        LULU:  My dad's missing.  
        TRACY:  What do you mean, missing?   He's supposed to be at the hospital getting his head straightened out. 
        LULU:  He was sprung 2 days ago.  Do you think he could be channeling my grandfather again?  
       LUKE:  Honey, I'm home!   
       TRACY:  How did you get here?  
       LUKE:  I took the bus.  But not the express bus.  I took the local and had them make a stop at an ink house.  Check this out  (shows Tracy and Lulu the Tim Spencer dragon tatoo)
       LULU:  OMG!   Dark Daddy is back!  
       TRACY:   You went from the mental hospital to the tattoo parlor?   Why do you want to have the same tattoo as your abusive bigot of a father?  
       LUKE:  So the damn thing would stop disappearing and reappearing on my arm!   I kept hallucinating that tattoo, so I figured I might as well make it permanent just to stop hallucinating.   Perfectly rational explanation, isn't it, cupcake?  
       LULU:  Roll your sleeve back down, Daddy.  That tattoo creeps me out.  

     ANNA'S ROOM

      ANNA:   I never thought Nikolas would turn out like the rest of his family.   What am I saying?  I just killed someone.   I need a drink of the strong stuff.  
      SLOANE:  What the hey?  I'll have some too.  It's not like I have a JOB to go to.   
      ANNA:  Remember the time you showed me your penis?   Now THAT was hilarious!   
      SLOANE:  I'm not sure how to take that, but I know I want to jump your bones right now.  (kisses Anna)  

     PCPD

    LUCAS:  Well, the DNA test supports the idea of a fraternal twin.  
    DELIA:  See!  (fingers crossed behind back) I'm telling the truth.  Denise is my daughter and Ava's twin sister.  
    SONNY:  How convenient, Delia.   Long lost twin.  What is this?  A soap opera?  
    DENISE:  I'm really youah daughtah?   So Kiki's mah niece?   This is great news.  I have a family heah in Poaht Chuckles!  
    DANTE:  Well, if you're not Ava, I don't have any evidence you committed a crime, so you're free to go.  
    DENISE:  Like, yay!   I'm gonna play with youah haih now, Kiki.   Hey, brothah Jules, can I crash at youah place, seein' dat I'm family an' all?  
    JULIAN:  Fine, whatever.  It's been a long day, Alexis.  Come back home and have some sex with me. 

    METROCOURT

    NATHAN:  Nina, how come you got married and didn't invite me?   I'm your brother-cousin!  
    NINA:  It all happened so fast, Jay.  Ric and I met, fell in love, and got married in, like, five seconds flat.   Silas is SO ancient history.   Aren't you happy for me?  
     NATHAN:  I don't know, Nina.  I think he's after something and he's only going to hurt you in the end.  
     NINA:  Is it so impossible to believe a man would love me for being my awesome, non-crazy self?  
    FRANCO:  So, Nathan, did you tell Nina that Ric is a no-good money-grubbing parasite yet?  Did ya, did ya, did ya?  
    NATHAN:  Shut up, Franco!  
    FRANCO:  But Ric is only after your money, Nina. 
    NINA:  Says the man who thinks I go around kidnapping babies!  
    FRANCO:  You still pissed about that?  Get OVER it already! 
 
    WYNDEMERE

     NIKOLAS:  How DARE you get caught by Tracy!   Ever heard of the concept of discretion?  
     ROSALIE:  Relax, Your Royal Uptightness!   I told Tracy I was talking to Nina.   Speaking of Nina, Michael wants me to bribe her into giving Franco's ELQ shares back to him.  
     NIKOLAS:  How about you bribe her into giving those shares to ME instead? 
     ROSALIE:  Like THAT won't raise any eyebrows around the Q mansion.  
     NIKOLAS:  Not if you use MY money instead of Michael's and tell them that Nina turned you down flat.  

     PENTONVILLE

    RIC:  So, I married Nina and she and I are going to share that money.  Sorry "Mom"  
    MADELINE:  Not so fast, deluded son-in-law.  You pull any shenanigans with my family's money and Nina will know you visited me here.  
     RIC:  Of COURSE you'd resort to blackmail.  Why am I not surprised? 
     MADELINE:  You get me out of here or you're TOAST, Mister Lansing.  TOAST!!!  

    WYNDEMERE

     ROSALIE: (over the phone)  Hello, beloved former boss.  Have I missed you! 
     NINA:  You know what's kinda weird?  I've missed you too.  
     ROSALIE:  What do you say we meet up tomorrow?   Catch up on the good old days when I was pushing you around in a wheelchair you never needed?   I promise it will be a lucrative--I mean lovely lunch.